Dan Haugen

This year’s music selections at Target Field — all Top 40 and classic rock, and no more local tunes — have been a let down. But so has the team. The quality of play on the field hasn’t merited “Massive Nights” or “I Will Dare.” Here’s some local music, though, that might be more appropriate this year:

“Everything Is Broken,” by Bob Dylan. Yup, that pretty much says it.

“Tailspin,” by The Jayhawks. This one is also self-explanatory.

“Lord, I’m Discouraged,” by The Hold Steady.

“Not The Kid,” by Communist Daughter. “I’m not the kid you knew. I’m not the kid you remember.” This one is in honor of Danny Valencia’s sophomore slump. He’s batting .211, down a 100 points from last year.

“The One To Save,” by Trampled By Turtles. “No matter what you want from me, I ain’t the one to save.” This one is for Joe Nathan, who appears ain’t the the one to save games this season.

“My Bad” by Wet Dog. “I give you a valentine on Christmas Day. I say happy birthday on our anniversary.” This one is for the fielding. I’m looking at you, Alexi Casilla.

“No Leg To Stand On,” by Mike Gunther. Here’s to Nishioka’s broken leg and bilateral leg weakness.

“Sweep Me Away,” by Polara. The Twins were swept in back-to-back series last week for the first time since 2003.

“Can’t Get A Spark,” by Sean Na Na.

“1999,” by Prince. Because the Twins are playing like it was 1999. Here’s a refresher from Doug Grow’s We’re Gonna Win Twins: “Last in home runs, last in runs scored, last in American League attendance, last in the A.L. Central Division with a 63-97 record.”

Any other suggestions?